Dear Candid Carrie, Asked And Answered

As usual, my e-mail box is flooded with fan adoration and reader questions. Alright, one e-mail from one reader and they wanted to know if I was still off my meds. But that's not what is important here. What is important is that you need to know that I take each one of my readers as seriously as they take me. Therefore, I am beginning an advice series called, Dear Candid Carrie. Cool, huh?. Let me help you.

Today's question is a real life question with a real life answer asked by a real life girlfriend of mine. I will post the question now and the answer later today. Feel free to attempt an answer it in the comment section because that will be fun for me and as legend has it, everyone is just six degrees away from Candid Carrie so this will help bring the topic full circle right back to me. There is no prize and only one right answer, mine. Ready?

Dear Candid Carrie, Asked:

Dear Candid Carrie: With that house full of kids and cats, do you and David have any “grown up” time?

Thanks for asking me that, you real life girlfriend of mine. With kids and cats running rampant at any given moment, David and I have devised the perfect system for our designated “grown up” time.

It is located on “the man’s side of the bed” right on top of my husband’s nightstand in plain sight. Can you see it? It is hidden in plain sight! Everybody has one and as soon as you find out what it is and how to use it properly, I guarantee you’ll be granted ample “grown up” time of your own.

Any guesses? I'll be back later. Here is a hint, the only reason there are no numbers on the clock is because I took the picture during the power outage we had this morning. That's right, gale force winds and a tornado-like advisory thing and I am thinking about my peeps.

Dear Candid Carrie, Answered

Certainly everyone has a money jar. If it isn't in your bedroom, move it there. Now. If you don't have a money jar, get a money jar (don't spend actual money on a money jar, use something you already have at home). I am afraid if I don't make this part abundantly clear to my readers, the result could be a barrage of new questions.

Dear Candid Carrie, I found a money jar at Target, but I think it is too large and doesn't provide the ambiance I was hoping to establish in my semi-fung-shui-ish bedroom.

It doesn't matter if it is a jar, a bowl, or a Ziploc sandwich bag. Please trust me, it isn't the size of the money jar that matters, it is how you use it.

The next part is very important. You will need to make the children very well aware of the money jar. If they find a coin on the floor, in the couch, near the curb or in the gutter ... it doesn't matter where they find it, tell them to put it in the money jar.

Be sure they know where the money jar is at all times. Don't move it around, they need to be able to access it. It needs to be tangible in your bedroom. This is key. Your children need to realize that there is an ever changing amount of coin in that money jar. The money adds up, keeps accumulating, never the same total twice. A quarter here, a penny there. The most important lesson for the children is that the amount of the money in that jar is never consistent. Never.

Now that you've introduced the money jar to the children and they are aware that the total increases a little bit here and a little bit there, you may proceed with your "quality grown up" time by telling the children that mom and dad need to "count the money."

** That's right kids, we have no idea how much money we have so we need to count it and if we get disturbed, we have to start counting all over and it will take even longer. You don't want that to happen do you?

** It doesn't matter if we just counted the money at lunch time, mommy thinks she got short changed and we need to count the money again.

** Sweetie, last time daddy counted his money first and this time mommy wants to make sure she gets the her money counted before daddy empties his wallet again.

** Listen, it is very important that mommy knows how much money there is in that jar. Now go get daddy from the couch and tell him mommy needs her money counted. Now.

Anyway, you've got the general picture. As children get older, you may need to be more specific with money issues.

** It may take longer to count the money, your father is easily distracted and can't line the up money like he did years ago.

** Well, I can't help it if we don't count the money quietly, sometimes I am shocked by the small amount of money your father has left after all the years.

** Of course I am sad, your father simply cannot manage his money any more and I needed to take matters into my own hands. It isn't that I mind, I just never thought we would have problems with our finances.

** No, don't wake your father. I am meeting with a financial planner, he told me that my assets have more value than anyone every estimated. I just need to diversify.

Next question. Anyone?

Well, when you have one I can be reached at candidcarrie at gmail dot com



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